Author: Winn Mete

 

Always Our Children

 

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were the new rage when my boys were just entering pre-school. Like all boys their age, they were enthralled by the masked foursome.

I met Nancy at our sons’ pre-school. Something in our respective personalities and many commonalities made us instant friends. Both of us were spouses of husbands serving on one of the new 260-foot Coast Guard cutters and spent about half of our time alone with the kids while our husbands were on patrol. But the heart of our friendship stemmed from the fact that we both had two sons who happened to be the same ages. Nancy’s boys were as passionate about the TMNTs as mine. Together, the four of them would play for hours, dressed in turtle costumes, brandishing all the trademark weapons of the masked fighters.

As stay-at-home moms, Nancy and I spent countless happy hours together while our foursome played. Other times, one of us would leave our two boys with the other if we needed some free time. Nancy knew when she wasn’t around, her boys were my boys, just as I knew the same. We were there for each other and we were there for each other’s children.

Greg’s tour ended and we transferred. I missed Nancy terribly, but I knew that hers’ was just one many friendships that would come and go over the years. It goes with being a military spouse. Yet no matter where we were stationed, I always found other moms to share the watch of our kids. We were all in the same boat (almost literally in the Coast Guard), and we all knew that it was our calling to help each other.

As my sons grew older and more independent, my dependence ons other moms dwindled. And though life was easier now that I could run to the store without the boys in tow or having to find someone to watch them, I missed being a part of the circle of shepherds tending each other’s flocks.

I hadn’t seen my son since the Christmas holidays. I was getting used to Greg’s absence, but Easter was only two weeks away. His Easter basket was in the mail, filled with chocolate bunnies and marshmallow Peeps. Greg was stationed in Okinawa—a dream come true for him, but way too far from home for this mom. I had no idea when I would see him again. Meanwhile, in just a couple of months my younger son, Matthew would leave to begin his life with the Air Force.

Aside from the love of my church, I found a family of support through a wonderful website, Marine Moms Online. It was the only site I know of that solely addressed concerns of mothers with children in the military. Twenty of years of marriage before a divorce taught me that sadly, wives can be disposable. But I will be the mother of my sons as long as I have breath in my body.

Through MMOL, I found moms living with the same questions, problems and answers as me. As mothers, most of us don’t fight the battles created by the leaders of this world. But there are a great many of us with sons and daughters who do. Across the Internet, mothers of troops from around the world intimately love and hold each other up in prayer. In a time when God is being stripped from every aspect of society, military moms bow their heads and lift up their hands to the God with the power to heal and restore. The kindness of these women and in some cases, the ultimate sacrifice they suffered humbles me.

Holidays spent apart are particularly painful. As I sat through Easter service with Matt, I was feeling particularly overwhelmed. I missed Greg even as Matt was only a couple of months away from leaving. But God gave me comfort from an email posted by a mom a few days prior.

“I remember my son's first holiday away from home when he was in boot camp. It was Easter. I remember washing dishes on Good Friday and crying. I would miss Easter with him, and his 19th birthday all in the same week. How would I survive?…”

This was Greg’s first Easter in the service. And like this lady’s son, Greg was also 19. As I tried to stem to tears I felt welling up, I replayed in my mind a phone call the day before from Greg. He was on his way to a barbecue at his sergeant’s home, eagerly looking forward to his first home cooked meal in months. It wouldn’t be a meal I prepared for him, but some family was taking in my son and sharing with him the comfort of their home, the food of their table.

At the same time, I was touched by another MMOL posting: “I wanted to share my wonderful Easter story. I was in Los Angeles with a friend. We saw four young men waiting for a bus and knew immediately they were Marines.

“We pulled over and yes they had a 96 hour leave, visiting Los Angeles for the first time. They had stayed in Hollywood the first night, not at all what they thought it would be. They wanted to go to the beach. We piled them all in the suv, found them a decent and inexpensive hotel by the beach, took them for burgers. They just had lunch but you know how young men can eat and we showed them around.

            Well two of them had been in boot camp with my son. What a wonderful treat for me. 

      We walked them to the movies…helped get them situated where they could walk everywhere: the beach, the Santa Monica promenade, and the pier with the ferris wheels you see in the movies. They called my cell the next morning to thank me.

So if any of you weren't with your son on Easter weekend I had the good fortune of being with four of your sons, great Marines.........and they are GREAT! Just wanted to share.”

As Pastor preached the Easter service message of Jesus’ sacrifice, I thanked God for the kindness of a lady I never met who had taken care of four young Marines.

I thanked Him for a family in Okinawa who knew that a home cooked meal on a holiday was the bread of life.

But mostly I thanked Him for giving us as mothers, tender hearts and the insight to know that a young man who would lay down his life in battle for his friends and for strangers, still needs to know that he is loved.

 

 

 

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